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Mother’s Day Without Mom Can Be Challenging

by Lexy Crist  

Mother’s Day and Father’s Day are two of the most important days throughout the whole year. They are days when our beautiful mothers and our courageous fathers are cherished by their loved ones and reminded of everything good they have done and everything they have accomplished as a mother/father. But not everyone is spending Mother’s Day or Father’s Day the same way. Some are making breakfast in bed for their mom, others are washing the car or going fishing with their dad, but what a lot of people fail to realize is what the children without a mother or father are doing on these special days.

As most of the Walkersville community knows, my mother Rhea Crist passed away May 14th, 2014 during my freshman year of high school and my life has never been the same since. My mother battled cancer for ten long years. We were like every other normal mother daughter relationship, we had our arguments and we nagged at each other a lot, but watching her take her last breath was one of the most heartbreaking moments of my entire life. This was the women who gave me my life, and I was watching hers end.

This Mother’s Day is a little different than others, although my mother passed away three days after mother’s day in 2014. This year Mother’s Day falls on her passing date. My family and I are planning to have a picnic at Heritage Farm Park where a tree was planted there in her honor three years ago. Although it is tough at times to cope with the fact all of my friends have moms to spend Mother’s Day with and I don’t, I know I can get through it because my mom raised me to be strong just like she was.  At times I question just how strong I am, but then I think of her, and I remember.

Math teacher Darrin Drum who recently lost his mother to cancer said, “This year I am spending Mother’s Day with my wife because she is the mother of my kids.” He added, “If you’re having a rough time coping after losing a parent then talk to someone because there are a lot more of us going through the same thing than you might think.”

Psychology teacher Paul Daly lost his mother to cancer six years ago. He said, “Mother’s Day changes when you get married and have kids; before it is spent with your mother, but after it is spent with the mother of your children. We used to send flowers or a card to my mom, but when she passed away I started calling my father on Mother’s Day just to tell him I am thinking of mom.” He added, “On this day if you do not have a mother or a father to share it with then surround yourself with people that you love, and always remember the ones you lost.”

Although not having a mother on Mother’s Day or a father on Father’s Day is hard. Talk to people about how you feel because holding in your true feelings hurts you even more. Our loved ones would want us to be happy and to enjoy life, not dwell on their passing. Carry their legacy with you and never let anyone forget them, but also make yourself happy while doing so.